The Slippery Slope of Technology and The Imperative of Instilling Morals

We live in an amazing period of time. Technology in particular has changed the World in innumerable ways, and honestly, I think most of them are good. Life on Earth has never known an era where the exploration of itself is so easily accessed. If you want to know everything there is to know about Turkey, both the bird and the Country, and all you have to do is type in a few key words, and you have it, right at the speed of light. Science and medicine have made such absolutely amazing leaps forward, stem cell research has created living tissue, the diseases and ailments which used to cripple and kill may one day be as insignificant as a common cold. The sheer knowledge available is nothing short of astounding. In many ways, it is a great time to be alive.

But something keeps gnawing at the back of my mind. An uncomfortable gut feeling that all this technology is robbing my kids of something (and they're not even really all that into tech stuff....yet) It comes from what I witness in the World around me. Everything is moving faster. Kids I babysit for play games I've never even heard of. 10 year-olds have Facebook accounts. Cyber-bullying has gone from an anomaly to commonplace. Due to the widening income gap and the disappearance of the middle class, parents are having to work longer hours and more days just to make ends meet. This results in hindered parental supervision. This isn't an attack; this is reality. In a short time, I know I'll be heading back into the "paid" workforce, and I have serious concerns regarding the immersion of my sons into technology.

But it's coming, one way or another. I can limit how much, but I can't outright make it disappear. So far, Klondike (I've decided to call Hubs Klondike because he really is like a big bear and also some friends have told me they hate the term "Hubs". so Sara G, that's for you)  and I have been sticking to our guns regarding video games. We agreed before Lucky was born that we would not go there, we had both grown up without nary a single Atari, and we feel like we're reasonably well-adjusted (shut up, stop laughing!). And so far, (granted, Lucky only just turned 6) we have held off. But we did get him a small tablet, for the learning and photos and videos he could learn to take, and truth be told, at times I seriously regret it. It has a timer so we can limit how much time he can use it, and it shuts off at 9pm. And yes, it's been used as punishment, if he really needs it, we take it away. It was taken away for 2 months the first time just to let him know we meant business. Yet I know, this is a picnic compared to other people's struggles with their "tweens" and teens. The pressure kids feel these days to be cool and fit in...I know, I know, I can literally feel some of you out there rolling your eyes and "tsk tsk"ing, but this is NOT the same world we grew up in.

Kids today are followed by their peers everywhere. Instagram, Snapchat, Facebook, Twitter.....and I'm sure there are more but I'm just too archaic to know about them. Young girls especially I worry for because in our society looks and popularity are deemed so vitally important to survival, that we now see cases of eating disorders in 8 year-olds, and God forbid a kid stands out or is different, when home is no longer the safe haven it once was. The door to their room shuts and they are still in constant contact with their peers. Of the few younger kids I am "friends" with on Facebook, this is the typical post I see: "Rate me." "TBH" (which means To Be Honest...an invitation for someone else to tell them what they really think of them) "Best Feature" etc etc etc...it goes on and on and is just a cringe worthy reminder of how vulnerable and fragile young kids are....and how much electronic media has saturated those typical tween stolen conversations, what we used to just nervously ask our closest friends about, now our children put out for the ENTIRE WORLD to judge. It's just so shockingly insane how everything is for public consumption.

One of the biggest, saddest, scariest, and alarming issues regarding our kids and social media to witness, for me, anyway, is the epidemic of rape and subsequent victim shaming. Not only are these girls being, you know, raped, but it's being recorded and shared. Yeah. Seriously. And so not only is this happening, but the real kicker? Even though there's insurmountable evidence in most of these new cases (you know...video), it's the victim more than ever who's now being blamed. A girl's bad decision to drink at a party is somehow now justifiable reason for her whole life to effectively be over. And the real, real kicker? Most of the instances of victim or slut-shaming is coming from other young girls. Can you even begin to wrap your head around that? Have we actually gone backwards in time? You can't blame just the parents for this. This is a cultural ailment. That when the verdict of one of the more widely-known of these cases (Steubenville) was released, in which both of the rapists were ordered jail time, the US media went crazy. Crazy with pity for the boys. You heard that right. No mention of how the young girls life was ruined, just that these two star athletes would never now make it to the pros.

I can't even. I just fucking can't even begin to accept that this is the World in which I have brought three young boys into. Is it scarier for Moms and Dads of girls? I don't know...how crazy is it that you have to tell your daughter "how to not get raped"? I don't know that fear, but I do know one thing. We as a society have seriously failed our sons if one of the first lessons of young adulthood isn't "Don't rape." How is that NOT a "thing" you teach your young man? What, you think morals are just built in to the package? I wish it were so. But the truth is, it's not. And before the kids learn it from their peers (who, I might add, are for the most part the LAST people you want making strong moral impressions on your kids...imagine what  a 12-18 year old kids' morals look like without any experienced guidance...anyone read "Lord of the Flies"?) they are better off, and more likely to have it stick, if they learn it from YOU. I'm not looking forward to the conversation, but I know it's coming, probably sooner than I'm even willing to admit. Maybe 12 is a stretch, maybe it's more like 9 or 10. When is it that we teach not to hurt or take advantage of one who is vulnerable? Is it enough to teach them not to step on ants?

SO this is not a blog tonight with any answers, sorry. I just wonder, and think back to when I was a kid, and imagine...just imagine, how easily things could have exploded out of hand had my friends and I been privy to all the trinkets and technology that my kids will grow up surrounded by. I just pray that I can shield them for as long as I can. Society is a thing which grows and grows and some of its new limbs are ugly while others serve to bring joy and beauty. I guess my job now is to direct my children to go towards that which is good and protect themselves, and others, from the new, ugly, parts.